A Hospice Story

The Grieving Heart on Mother's Day

Submitted by: Denise Torgerson - May 12, 2017

For most people, Mother's Day is a time of celebration and appreciation towards one of the most important people in their lives. A time of joy and love.

For some people though, people who are grieving the loss of their mother, as Mother's Day approaches a feeling of dread and heaviness arises.

Every time they shop, they are reminded of their loss. Every time they turn on the TV they are reminded of their loss. They can't go anywhere without their grief showing up for them. As the day looms closer, they wonder how they are going to cope.

Everyone is unique and so everyone's grief experience is unique. It is important for you to honor your own process. To honor your mother and at the same time honor the loss of her and the grief you feel around the loss.
If you want to acknowledge Mother's Day and are not sure how to do it. Here are some ideas, some rituals that will help you move through this day.

  1. Buy your mom a card and write a letter to her expressing your feelings to her. Tell her what you appreciate and love about her.
  2. Buy a bouquet of her favorite flowers and place them in a prominent place. Every time you see the flowers through out your day, give yourself a moment (or more) to grieve – to feel what you are feeling.
  3. Find a trusted friend and reach out. Talk about your mom and your relationship with her. Talk about the emotions you are feeling.
  4. Share your memories with others. Celebrate your history. Remembering is cathartic. Hearing other's stories about your mom can be a joyful experience.
  5. Take care of yourself! If you want to take a nap, take one. It takes an enormous amount of energy to grieve. This day you can be your own mother and take care of yourself.

Mother's Day can be a difficult day, bringing forward a lot of emotional pain. The act of acknowledging this is a healthy way of moving through the grief. Creating a ritual can alleviate some of the pressure of resisting the pain and allow you to remember your mom in a loving way.

Be Gentle With Yourself…

 

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